New Year's Resolution Resolved!

Thursday, January 1, 2015
Happy New Year 2015, Inner Constellation Readers! Winter is turning, and the IC theme for January is moving from “stillness” (December) to “resolution.” I don’t know if you’re one to set a New Year’s Resolution, but if you’ve ever aspired for personal improvement, no matter what the time of year, this article is for you.

A few days ago, I had a temper tantrum, a sudden irritation that spurted out of me so fast, I didn’t realize it had manifested until…well, it had manifested. It was late, past my bedtime and fortunately me and my beloved (who was the lucky reciprocator) realized I was tired and feeling the effects of a fairly emotional day, so we stopped what we were doing and put me to bed! However, when my eyes opened to the new day, a resolution become clear—my seed of anger needs attention.

What do I mean by “seed”? I’ve considered this metaphor for years—emotions as seeds, present in each of us: anger, jealousy, sadness, as well as patience, generosity, love, etc. Which seeds do we choose to water? For instance, on the particular day of my flair up, I had interpreted a court procedure resulting in a heart-breaking chain of events rehashed the entire day. I had practiced mindfully tending to my emotions, aware that my seeds of anger, grief and judgment were being watered again and again, but still the residual flare up. I obviously needed to raise the level of my self-care. Here’s a question to consider when an emotional seed appears—what is its antidote? In other words what is the emotion’s opposite, in the case of anger, the antidote might be: patience, acceptance of how things are, peace, humor, gentleness. What if  I make a conscious commitment to selectively water anger’s opposite, the seeds of patience, peace and gentleness? Next time I become aware of anger in my body I will:

1)      stop
2)      identify what’s present
3)      breathe while giving myself the antidote

Breath my anchor, in and out, while establishing compassion for myself, patience and acceptance. Hmm, good food for thought, this will take daily practice. I look forward to diving deep into the January theme of resolution*, and the commitment that Inner Constellation practitioners take to mindfully identify, transform and resolve all resistances so we can flow into the year 2015!


*if you would like to receive the M-F email Inner Constellation Blessing send as a gift, please contact me. 

2 comments/leave a comment:

  1. Teresa said...:

    Thank you for this. I love the idea of you and your husband "putting you to bed." How lucky to have a partner who could come toward you instead of running away from your anger or striking out with his own. How wonderful that you could "come toward" you, too. I found myself thinking of first responders, who run toward the emergencies the rest of us flee. It struck me that "first responder" could be a metaphor to that habit so many of us would like to cultivate, of watering the seeds of anger, frustration and anxiety not with gasoline but with love and compassion.

  1. Teresa, cultivating a "first responder" attitude toward ourselves (and others) is a beautiful metaphor, and I've always been struck by the compassionate response of first responders. I wrote an article here that you might appreciate: http://innerconstellation.blogspot.com/2013/04/boston-marathon-heroes.html.
    Thank you, I'll carry this with me in my practice.

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