Happy New Year 2015, Inner Constellation Readers! Winter is
turning, and the IC theme for January is moving from “stillness” (December) to “resolution.” I don’t know if you’re one
to set a New Year’s Resolution, but if you’ve ever aspired for personal
improvement, no matter what the time of year, this article is for you.
A few days ago, I had a temper tantrum, a sudden irritation
that spurted out of me so fast, I didn’t realize it had manifested until…well,
it had manifested. It was late, past my bedtime and fortunately me and my
beloved (who was the lucky reciprocator) realized I was tired and feeling the
effects of a fairly emotional day, so we stopped what we were doing and put me
to bed! However, when my eyes opened to the new day, a resolution become clear—my
seed of anger needs attention.
What do I mean by “seed”? I’ve considered this metaphor for
years—emotions as seeds, present in each of us: anger, jealousy, sadness, as
well as patience, generosity, love, etc. Which seeds do we choose to water? For
instance, on the particular day of my flair up, I had interpreted a court
procedure resulting in a heart-breaking chain of events rehashed the entire
day. I had practiced mindfully tending to my emotions, aware that my seeds of
anger, grief and judgment were being watered again and again, but still the residual
flare up. I obviously needed to raise the level of my self-care. Here’s a
question to consider when an emotional seed appears—what is its antidote? In
other words what is the emotion’s opposite, in the case of anger, the antidote
might be: patience, acceptance of how things are, peace, humor, gentleness.
What if I make a conscious commitment to selectively water anger’s opposite, the seeds
of patience, peace and gentleness? Next time I become aware of anger in my body
I will:
1)
stop
2)
identify what’s present
3)
breathe while giving myself the antidote
Breath my anchor, in and out, while establishing compassion
for myself, patience and acceptance. Hmm, good food for thought, this will take
daily practice. I look forward to diving deep into the January theme of resolution*, and the commitment that
Inner Constellation practitioners take to mindfully identify, transform and resolve
all resistances so we can flow into the year 2015!
*if you would like to receive the M-F email Inner Constellation Blessing send as a gift, please contact me.
*if you would like to receive the M-F email Inner Constellation Blessing send as a gift, please contact me.
Thank you for this. I love the idea of you and your husband "putting you to bed." How lucky to have a partner who could come toward you instead of running away from your anger or striking out with his own. How wonderful that you could "come toward" you, too. I found myself thinking of first responders, who run toward the emergencies the rest of us flee. It struck me that "first responder" could be a metaphor to that habit so many of us would like to cultivate, of watering the seeds of anger, frustration and anxiety not with gasoline but with love and compassion.
ReplyDeleteTeresa, cultivating a "first responder" attitude toward ourselves (and others) is a beautiful metaphor, and I've always been struck by the compassionate response of first responders. I wrote an article here that you might appreciate: http://innerconstellation.blogspot.com/2013/04/boston-marathon-heroes.html.
ReplyDeleteThank you, I'll carry this with me in my practice.