A Daughter Gives Thanks

I lost my father yesterday, November 21, 2012. As I write this, I’m sitting on a plane, flying from West to East to comfort and be comforted by family. I had plans this week, to write a blog article on one of my favorite “Chart Your Course,” practices that always manages to get me moving in the right direction—practicing gratitude. “In any and all situations, give thanks” is my motto. I had imagined such an article timed to the Thanksgiving holiday.

Yesterday  was one of my greatest gratitude tests. As I lay in bed last night, I could not stop crying, tears flowed, non-stop. The closest words to describe the feelings were, “heart-break.” Interestingly, this description was signed to me by a Deaf client only a few days prior as tears streamed down his face uncontrollably. He had received a similar blow, having heard of a friend’s passing. Yes, the evening of November 21, my heart physically hurt. I apologized to my husband as it approached 1:00am and still I wept, “I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me!”

“Nothing’s wrong with you,” he said, gathering my wet self in his arms. Then he asked, “What are you thinking about?”

My answers were telling: a sense of heavy regret, that perhaps my pop is struggling somehow, and lastly, that I love him. My husband paused then and ever so gently asked, “Not baseball, or bowling?” My mirror, my Love, steered me back to one of my North Stars: be grateful. Within minutes the tears stopped, and I was sound asleep, lulled by what a sucker my pop was for animals and little kids, as evidenced the day we were shooting hoops, and I convinced him to buy me a parakeet if I made some crazy back-bend basket move that I had never before made in my life—until that day. When we arrived home with the bird, he took the heat for me, explaining to my mother that he had promised--and a promise made, is a promise kept. I called the parakeet, “Pretty Boy."

Whenever my heart begins aching on this Thanksgiving Day, I do my very best to think of the blessings of my father’s life. May your Thanksgiving be filled with promises kept and gratitude for family, friends and loved ones.