Dirty Angels

Friday, June 24, 2016
I had a few of them appear last evening (larger than mosquitoes) and tried to swat them away to no avail! Dang it, I thought I was beyond this...I had a blow up with a loved one last night and got sucked in!

I woke at 2:30a with a heavy heart and decided to take my sorry self outside to sleep beneath the moon and morning star. I dragged my Therm-A-Rest and sleeping bag onto my deck and as soon as I got settled, I knew--this is the stuff of transformation, the blow up is the practice. I missed the first opportunity to transform the crappy-crap, but garbage is in a constant process of becoming a rose, so, um...get to work.

"Hello, my dirty angels, I see you..." I tapped, I breathed, I identified, and I lay beneath the bright moon and finally drifted off to sleep, into dreamland, where I saw one of my precious "Tahoe" Moms. She sat in our green garden rocking chair directly next to where I was laying on the deck, and motioned to the dark sky overhead--a cosmic scene like the pictures from NASA unfolded. Black and crimson gases erupted from a bubbling star field. She looked into my soul, like she has a tendency to do, and asked, "Do you have the ability to pull from this glorious Creation?"

The swirling beauty of stars, filled me, "Yes, ma'am!" I say silently in my dream. It's that kind of moment. When I woke, I asked the dream question to the moon, which now hung directly over me--"Do you have the ability to pull from this glorious Creation?"

She answered, "Of course, My Dear." I closed my eyes and went back to sleep. Some things are best given over to the night sky.

I woke this morning entirely refreshed and committed to continuing the journey using my North Star of love and compassion as my guide. I know too, my dirty angels should not be swatted. Their wings are tattered enough. They appear to show me what needs tending. "Hello, Little Rose," they say, "it's time for transformation."

Orlando Nightclub

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

I showed up to class yesterday and felt the white elephant in the room, a blanket that seemed to lay heavy on us all. I have two students in the class who are part of the LGBT community and they looked devastated. I proceeded with curriculum, making a quick adjustment to the evening to allow for a solid 30 minutes of discussion before we closed for the night. I love my students with a ferocity that often surprises me, and often when something like the shooting in Orlando happens, I think...that could have been one of mine...one of mine, it is one of mine--this has affected us all. In our classroom conversation I asked the question, how many of you were angry? All but two of my seventeen raised their hands. How many of you were sad? All of them raised their hands. Then, the question that always seems to be asked in return? What can we do?

Hmmm, we contemplated and discussed that natural, beautiful impulse of wanting to do something to relieve the suffering we see. Here was my reply--take care of those seeds of anger and sadness within yourself, for they are a taste of what caused the gunman to shoot. 

I came home from school, and as is my nature, I went to the written word for comfort. I hope this provides nourishment....


Orlando Nightclub
©June 14, 2016 Karla Johnston, InnerConstellation.com

Watching events unfold, I feel my Avenging Angel sprout wings,
Hello, my anger…my sadness.
I threaten flight.
Then, I’m not sure how, but a sudden realization, a blessing is bestowed—
righteous anger is a taste of what caused such tremendous suffering.
Seeds of anger and intolerance when watered will grow.
Is this what happened to the gunman?

What can I do for those suffering?
Take care of my unwholesome seeds,
listen to my Dirty Angels—they show me what needs care,
practice looking at myself and others
with love and understanding.


I see you, our seeds, and practice another way—taking refuge:
in stillness,
deep listening,
and transformation.






In closing, here is a mantra that I found beautiful and healing. May you enjoy the voice of an angel, Ajeet Kaur, who sings a song to turn our minds toward peace and ease of rest. It's sung before sleep, or for the final sleep of dying: Antajaamee








Tender Vesak Day!!!

Sunday, May 22, 2016
Last evening's beautiful full moon marked the celebration of  the Buddha: the cycle of his birth, enlightenment, passing and continuation.

Light plays a dominant role in the Vesak celebration festivities as a reminder of our own Buddha Nature--the seed of goodness within that if watered, grows throughout our lives and influences those around us.

This day's blessing is inspired by the light inside every living being:

Vesak
©Karla Johnston, InnerConstellation.com 
Seed of awakening
planted within,
Moon kissed.
Will you water it?
The importance of self care so we can care for others seems to perfectly encapsulate our May Inner Constellation theme of "tenderness." I've heard many laments this month about how difficult it can be to be tender towards ourselves. Tenderness is a daily practice--a commitment to mindfully attend to one's "Inner Constellation," take care of our sufferings and cultivate peace and understanding within. Mindfulness of one's body, mind, emotions and mental state is a vital part of the Buddha's teachings. When we are clear and without interferences, we are more fully present for our loved ones and our community. Mindfulness, gentle attending, practice, more mindfulness...thank you Buddha for your wisdom....


May you have a happy, full-moon, lighted up day with much love and care on this tender Vesak weekend!




Summer Mindfulness Retreat: July 17, 2016; theme "Harmony"

Monday, May 16, 2016

LTMC has expanded our seasonal retreat by one hour at suggestion of participants to enjoy more time together, three hours wasn't enough! On Sunday, July 17, please bring silverware, cup and plate for yummy victuals and light fare if you would like to share. We try to keep it simple and sustainable. Harmony is our theme--how lovely for the summer months. LTMC looks forward to practicing with you and restoring and nourishing ourselves, our loved ones, and our community. Peaceful steps....

Blanket of Tenderness...Ahhhhh....

Wednesday, May 4, 2016
"...Turn, every turn, Little Bud...."
Happy Spring and soon to be Mother's Day! I've been pondering a question--when something potentially challenging is coming up, is it possible to ease off the petal and nurture oneself in preparation? I believe this question prompted May's Inner Constellation theme of "tenderness." I have a challenging invitation coming up and I as I slow down to prepare another interesting question has surfaced: If I were to write inspiration to myself when I'm in the thick of it, what would I write? Well, a poem of course--a short, sweet reminder of the Eternal....


Spring Sermon
©2016 Karla Johnston, InnerConstellation.com

A blanket of tenderness covers,
receive its warmth.
Unfold as a new bud to sunshine
and provide an open surface
for rays to land.

Clouds, rain, sleet and snow;
yet, Eternal Light remains, warm and true.
Turn, ever turn, Little Bud:
Stop,
Notice,
Return,
Breathe. …
A blanket of tenderness covers.

Purple Rain on Earth Day

Friday, April 22, 2016
"Purple rain, purple rain....I only want to see you underneath the purple rain."

I heard the news yesterday afternoon with nostalgia--remembering his amazing vocal range, Prince was at times unbelievable to me, magic. He is an amazing example of someone who broke stereotypes and refused labels and in the process gave his audience an intimate performance of music. His lyrics are so poetic, my heart was won at an early age.

Yesterday, I went on with my day and in the evening, I noticed I had a heavy-heart, very unlike me, and as I did my evening chores, I couldn't quite put my finger on it; then one of my Tahoe moms sent a text:

"Are you sad that Prince died?"

Yes, yes indeed I am.  I hummed Purple Rain most of the day and realized we lost a holy one who knew he was in his element when he was singing--he exuded that in his voice, in his flowy actions, in his impact. When we are in our groove, Momma Earth sends that vibration out to the four corners and beyond--we strike chords within the hearts of many and that precious gift lives beyond form.
Honey, I know, I know I know times are changing
It's time we all reach out for something new,  that means you too...                                 let me guide you to the purple rain 
RIP, sweet Prince.

(Re)Birth of O Mio Babbino Caro

Tuesday, April 12, 2016
Watch Amira's performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWpLfncliwU 
Happy Spring, Beautifuls! April's Inner Constellation theme is "birth." One of the most prominent appearances of new beginnings is the introduction to Amira Willighagen from Holland. She is this month's inspirational figure for the IC Freedom Series category of this blog--a person who has the influence to orient others in the direction of True North. Words can't do justice in describing this amazing young person...so without further ado, please sit back and enjoy a treat....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWpLfncliwU

Teaching oneself to sing opera via YouTube, really? Have you ever attempted to sing opera? Perhaps you can sing beautifully too! Without any preconceived notion of failure, Amira, age 6 at the time, begins...and listen to what is born--a voice "so pure and so beautiful," as remarked by one of those who truly heard. Amira is a poster child for turning toward what inspires, what is wholesome and beautiful and allowing whatever it is to move through you and become a vehicle of expression--perhaps this is one definition of birth. Her talent is not hers alone, however (thanks to YouTube (!), grandma Elsa who listened and encouraged, her parents, violinist brother who inspired her, Holland's Got Talent, the Golden Ticket). The interbeing nature of all the bright North Stars who influenced Amira's young life are many.  

In the month of April, what will you encourage to move through you? Spring time holds the energy of the earth as it is reborn--growth is unstoppable as it moves up and out, gifting us with its expression in the form of green grass, flowers, newborns and the voice of an angel....

Here's a link to Amira Willighagen's Album on YouTube if more infusion is needed:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFDE5hDtTo&list=PL4dWT5w6l2Q2RI7bcS1LhPgvipYglXlhh

May you have a blessed spring, inspired by beauty, peace and happiness.