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Monday, July 30, 2012

Olympians' North Stars

This summer's Olympics are in full swing and whenever I listen to athletes' interviews, I hear "North Stars" abound, the first step in my Inner Constellation work with people. The idea of North Star is a metaphor I've coined to represent that which is one's fundamental priority or supreme motivator in life above all else. The Olympians give supreme examples of North Stars:

  • "I always do my best."
  • "No matter how bad it may look, I never give up."
  • "I want to have fun in everything I do." (Dana Vollmer, a swimmer who won her first gold metal in the 100 meter Fly and broke a world record!)
  • "It's important that I always challenge myself."
  • "I appreciate everything I've ever earned or been given."

North Stars help us know where we're going before we push off to sea, keeping us on track, and here's the most important thing--North Stars are immovable, unlike goals, which are often confused with the North Star metaphor. Goals are often set and exceeded, or sometimes, unattainable, such as: I want to win gold in the 100 meter Fly, or, I want to be strong and resilient. If you sink like a brick when you jump in the pool (like me:) or you're suffering from an autoimmune disease, these goals may not be reachable. North Stars, on the other hand, are always attainable, "I do my personal best....I never give up....fun is my top priority....I appreciate and give thanks. The immovable and often universal North Stars, when held in sight, have incredible power to direct and focus our lives, so we always know what's most important during the crazy distractions of life. Goals support our North Stars and are the action steps that make up "Chart Your Course", the second step in my Inner Constellation work with people. If the idea of North Star is appealing to you, consider checking out my Inner Constellation Compendium which gives more detail about this beautiful metaphor. 

In ancient days of star navigation, a person found his or her way in uncharted territory by first locating the North Star. Find your North Star and you will always have an internal compass. From North Star, the course can be mapped and arrival certainly promised--as long as True North is kept in sight. 



Thursday, July 19, 2012

Tahoe Bear Break-in--Brownies Nabbed!

Tuesday was quite an auspicious day. I had a very insightful session in the afternoon with a trauma survivor which got me pondering the body's innate ability to beautifully handle extreme stress and sensory overload (don't worry, I'll get to the main headline in a sec:). After the day's work, I decided to take off on a run. As I was sprinting through the woods (I'm getting closer ...), I realized that for me a way of dealing with overload in my body is to put on my running shoes and head out the door. Every since I was old enough to run, I would lace up my shoes and take off. When my energy was spent, I would (and still do) stop, lie down on the ground and simply breathe. The stillness flooding my body after flight is, how can I say it--refuge.

Flight, fight or freeze are typical reactions to sensory overload, and in spite of the pathological way stress reactions are often viewed, they are purposeful, adaptive and in extreme situations, keep one alive--like in the event a bear breaks into your house. When I got home from my run, I kissed my kitty, Yogini, chillin' on the couch and jumped in the shower. After scrubbing up, I walked down the hall and noticed the screen window in the kitchen torn and flapping in the breeze! Heart pounding, my nervous system shot into overdrive--so much for the run. Funny, how in Tahoe one's first thought when seeing such a thing isn't "who" broke in but "what" broke in. The mess in the kitchen told the story--brownie pan scraped clean but still on the counter, lid placed beside it, and a bag of instant potatoes lying on the floor with the cupboard drawer having been neatly closed. As I walked over to the window to assess damage, I heard a sloppy scuffling sound out on the deck--there lay a big cinnamon Black Bear, on her belly, enjoying a bag of brown sugar!

"Crap!" I said aloud, startling the bear into flight as she lumbered off the deck and into the nearby woods. Now, a funny thing happened--I began spontaneously giving thanks: Yogini was safe (she had bolted under the bed in the back room), other than the screen and cleaning out the sweets, damage was minimum, the bear had stayed confined to the kitchen, she hadn't disturbed an open flame boiling a pot of hot water on the stove, the list went on and on. It can always get worse. With all the thanksgiving, my breathing and heart rate calmed down and I began seeing the blessings.

In addition to flight, fight, or freeze, there's another response--flow. I picked up my running shoes left by the front door and put them in the closet.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

"Oh, say, can you see..."

Independence Day has come and gone, and my reflection on freedom was more profound than ever. Perhaps it's the state of the world and the fight for freedom in the Middle East and around the world and the fact that social media has brought the Arab Spring into our living rooms. I know for me, I'm no longer insulated from hardships around the world. Here's an example, do you know that only 43% of the world's population is free? This number is recorded by Freedom House, an organization that tallies government and civil freedoms, human rights as well as freedom of the press. Once I heard this number, I was motivated to do something with my freedom and appreciate daily all the blessings of living in a free society. I suppose this personal practice of recognition is reflected in our National Anthem, The Star Spangled Banner:

"Oh, say can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming.
And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof thro' the night that our flag was still there.
Oh say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?"

Keeping "freedom" in sight is akin to the North Star analogy--recognizing what is dear and valued above all else and keeping it foremost as top priority. May you enjoy and appreciate your freedom not just July 4th but every day. In the spirit of energy--that which we give our attention to increases. May freedom abound.